Thursday, December 2, 2010

Thoughts for a Novel




Thoughts for a Novel


Well, perhaps others get it or they do not; perhaps it is somewhere in between. My physics doomed to go where all compromises go until we figure out if the earth or the sun is the center of the universe, some Tycho Brae who left his name on some rather radiant crater on the moon. Anyway, what I said and its evolving is there for a reference as I decide to change pace awhile- thoughts more personal and philosophic due to another winter and my children interested in their ancestors. But it is the linguistic theme, I know now that a lot of the rules of grammar in the use of English were private myths and far too rigid for a living language. For awhile then I will post here some thoughts that may be worthy of sharing and developing as a novel. What is it about us that we are so curious about our ancestors and stories of their childhood? But in this fiction I shall try to keep the scenes close to the facts that transcend their artistic embellishments in hopes that what we amazing humans learn is somehow universal, perhaps beyond that.

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You Were No Angel
L. Edgar Otto
12-01-10



(some first ideas for a novel project recalling the lives of relatives- whom at the time I did not think the stuff of novels... The general themes here, when I can learn to write better, are the changes we go thru over time so far from others, we now butterflies disdaining the egg let alone the worm or ourselves and each others metamorphosis. And this one that seems so visceral and sensual and creamy- that great question of what it means to deal with one's real and step parents in the context of individual experience, culture, and what is passed down as myth and family.)



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"Too often we learn, if we learn, compassion for others because we have hurt them."(my status on facebook today)



"You were no angel in days gone by, you asked no question so why should I ?I don't care what you used to be, for I know what your are today." (an old country duet)



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Intent and distracted, concentrating on his mixing of colors, the flow of water and salt like tears on paper with the gravity, an eyelash detaches from his camel hair brush as he tries to paint within the lines, melt the hues and break the cakes of wax from his color box. Eugene's cigarette fell from his lips that surprised him with involuntary quivering delaying his jumping up to find it from smoke and ash and the sunset cherry threat of fire between his legs.



In the dry desert sands before empires spread the Sultan's rule over the trade routes and migrations of the people, before the prince had his nursemaid and the eunuchs served and entertained, their boyish chants and songs, their catering and choice of gossamer veils assisting the lady of the day with her toilet, she picked from the harem, the tribal and pagan people following a wandering star across the milky way ten thousand generations in search of frankincense, Abigail knew that it was not she who gave birth who was the mother of her princely child, but her big bosom slave woman who indulged him with her breasts.



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Some of today's chat with Sebastian:


Today
[Sebastian Otto]
11:24am
good work on the family tree, very cool to see it layed out
[You]
11:25am
I need to check the spelling and dates and list a little bio for each one I remember
It used to be spelled Dickson when I looked up some records in Charlotte, that family from around the Morehead City NC area
[Sebastian Otto]
11:26am
i was wondering why some like Helen Kay and Phillip looked faded
step?
[You]
11:26am
It made me think about writing a short novel that told of things I remembered
that was an afterthought Melvin is step brother and Helen Kay and Phil are half siblings
I did write a short paragraph or two but I am not sure it is good enough writing- I will post it as "You Were No Angel" shortly in my NOTES
[Sebastian Otto]
11:29am
i think it would be a cool project to make another pie chart with my genetics. not just yours and moms. like a merger of the two
[You]
11:29am
did you mean your blog invite only- it is OK but I want to know if it is an error?
hehe
just divide the chart into 8, merge them?
[Sebastian Otto]
11:30am
there is a story why my blog was put off the web for awhile. mom got really nosey and was reading my stuff
she got upset when i bashed David a bit
and made a big deal about the stolen cell phone i had
[You]
11:31am
I suppose you could call Norman's German part and Gustav's Prussian part German
oh
[Sebastian Otto]
11:31am
i don't want to write online if i get bad feedback like that
so Ive been wondering how to deal with it
either make an alias project or filter myself more
[You]
11:32am
well, you are entitled to your private stories, and maybe some pictures. On gals mom overreacted and grounded her- but I thought the facebook pics were rather innocent.
[Sebastian Otto]
11:32am
it sucks really, but she is good at hunting down things about you online
[You]
11:32am
I should hire her
poor gal, sifting thru my obscure physics!
I tried to find some of my relatives on line but have no luck at all, yesterday
[Sebastian Otto]
11:33am
well i know Nate is doing an extensive hunt
[You]
11:33am
It is like I am in a different universe
[Sebastian Otto]
11:33am
i need to share what Ive found
[You]
11:33am
I wonder what Nathan wants to find
and Lauren
[Sebastian Otto]
11:34am
Justin is in Virginia now
[You]
11:34am
how we all died of some disease maybe?
[Sebastian Otto]
11:34am
and i should give him directions to buddy's grave
[You]
11:34am
Yeah, I saw him yesterday on line at the house and he said there as a bed for you if you needed it
I said well it is good to know he is welcome
then (as if someone was watching) they said Arian is welcome too
hmmmm
Justin said it was warm but dead there and the palm gone
but if he gets bored he can always go somewhere
[Sebastian Otto]
11:36am
if anyone, Justin is good at smoothing things over
[You]
11:36am
we know what a job that will be with your mom
e
I mean
what if I find some relatives after all this time
I did find an email which said my step mom only 6 yrs older had kidney failure Etta Grey
[Sebastian Otto]
11:37am
you know, i found some Ottos in Norfolk
i never had the time to visit them, but they are out there
[You]
11:37am
I mean, maybe I don't want to find out they vanished long ago-
[Sebastian Otto]
11:38am
its a hard project to undertake but it seems everyone is interested
it must be because of baby talk
[You]
11:38am
I doubt any there are related- but amazingly in the photo store picking up photos I mean David Otto from Boston who was my grandfathers brothers cousin
Yeah, the idea of seeing if one looks like a relative. All you kids look more to me like one or another of my relatives
[Sebastian Otto]
11:39am
i thought the Dixons were German too?
[You]
11:40am
Jean and me stayed with David who is a phd Harvard environmentalist when Arian was born
[Sebastian Otto]
11:40am
and where is mom's native American?
[You]
11:40am
They are English- but I think there may be a little Danish in them but cannot verify it
I may have confused the great grandpa of Minnie who was all indian but in the merchant marine
it was so long that my grandma only knew how to speak Cherokee in the child hood hymns
she told me of stories of her in the log cabins with (uncle Joe Hooker) whomever he was
[Sebastian Otto]
11:42am
interesting
[You]
11:42am
heck, I enjoyed stories myself of their childhoods and I never thought it was the stuff of a great novel
one time they went to the silent movies and when a picture of a locomotive came toward the screen everyone ran out of the theater
[Sebastian Otto]
11:43am
i think it would be awesome if you had a book
several books
[You]
11:43am
hmmmm
I bought some books (see spheresendblog) for 30$ to help improve my English
yesterday- first I bought something for myseolf in a great while
[Sebastian Otto]
11:44am
you did some poem project not that long ago that i really liked. what was the name of it? distar? no
[You]
11:44am
Infinitea
[Sebastian Otto]
11:45am
i think that was it
[You]
11:45am
but it was rather sci fantasy
[Sebastian Otto]
11:45am
it seemed like a good format for it to be published or something
[You]
11:45am
I did write a series of poems Pipe Song of the Sea Horse but it is lost
I extensively discussed the situation after the break up - wrote it for all you guys\
oh well
it was hard just typing the titles 600
[Sebastian Otto]
11:46am
yeah that is a shame
[You]
11:46am
all it takes is practice really
[Sebastian Otto]
11:46am
but you have new stuff now
[You]
11:47am
yeah guess so, but how many times can we reinvent ourselves
and I have to sort out what I can recall of that work
when I make something new
but most things are lost we write4
and living is more important
it is just that I set up so much, so that it could in theory leave you guys something and I would not have to mess with govt retirement bs
guess, it could happen again
but we all have to do best we can in our lives
and I am sad that I made so many mistakes with everyone, like my brothers
and that all that sacrifice in the name of work cannot now be paid back
all I can say is
try to do better for you own family tree down line
too much learning to care for others, if we can learn the lesson, is remorse from hurting them
... damn I am writing some sort of novel :-):-)

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